Frisco Grill has excellent guacamole, decent margaritas and a fine mahi-mahi fish taco. They also have live music on weekends, and a low-key, neighborhood atmosphere. Their televisions leave something to be desired, but there are plenty of screens showing various games on any given night. They also do a fine job on nachos and chile con queso dip. Just don't order the vegetarian burrito. The tofu lacks flavor, and has a creamy texture that doesn't quite belong.
In the same shopping center is Pub Dog (http://www.dogpub.net/). It occupies the space once taken by the Hard Times Cafe. While I was sorry to see Hard Times go, the Columbia location was always the red-headed stepchild of the franchise. The food and service paled in comparison to the Northern VA and Bethesda locations. I was always baffled by how the Columbia Hard Times managed to screw up chili, onion rings and chicken wings.
Fortunately, the new Pub Dog (a Baltimore favorite that expanded to Columbia) is a solid establishment with excellent service, good deals and tasty microbrews. I could go on about how friendly the manager and servers are; it's the type of place where you can walk in alone, and have new friends by the end of the night. My only suggestion to Pub Dog is to add some greasy bar treats to the appetizer menu. While the personal pizzas are pretty good, I would love to be able to order some chicken wings, nachos or cheese fries to go with my 2-for-$4 beers.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Seriously...what's the deal?
I was driving to work the other day, and this crazy woman came up behind me in her Honda. She was right on my tail, and clearly angered by the fact that I was only willing to go the speed limit.
There was a car in the lane next to us, and the minute it sped up as if to overtake me, Ms. Road Rage whipped in behind it. My neighbor was merely matching my speed, and eventually fell behind a bit. This caused the nut-job in the Honda to get back on my tail. Guess she thought if she applied enough pressure I'd put the pedal to the metal. No dice.
Meanwhile the car next to me slowed enough to create a gap for the tail-gater to squeeze in between them and the car in front. Now Ms. Road Rage was right next to me, and hard on the heels of the car in front of them. Too bad they were coming up on some traffic and had to slow down. Sigh. Ms. Road Rage zipped in behind me...again.
This went on for several miles. Given the opportunity, I would have gladly gotten over so she could own the lane; but because she jumped in next to me the minute there was an open space, I had nowhere to go. It was amusing in a futile way, but also a fine example of what's wrong with drivers in this area: they are consumed with self-importance, anger and impatience.
There was a car in the lane next to us, and the minute it sped up as if to overtake me, Ms. Road Rage whipped in behind it. My neighbor was merely matching my speed, and eventually fell behind a bit. This caused the nut-job in the Honda to get back on my tail. Guess she thought if she applied enough pressure I'd put the pedal to the metal. No dice.
Meanwhile the car next to me slowed enough to create a gap for the tail-gater to squeeze in between them and the car in front. Now Ms. Road Rage was right next to me, and hard on the heels of the car in front of them. Too bad they were coming up on some traffic and had to slow down. Sigh. Ms. Road Rage zipped in behind me...again.
This went on for several miles. Given the opportunity, I would have gladly gotten over so she could own the lane; but because she jumped in next to me the minute there was an open space, I had nowhere to go. It was amusing in a futile way, but also a fine example of what's wrong with drivers in this area: they are consumed with self-importance, anger and impatience.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Terrorists sneak around (TSA)
Yesterday I had the pleasure of flying around the US, and I was reminded of why I call the TSA "Terrorists Sneak Around". Since the institution of the new, post-9/11 TSA regulations, the American air traveler has been continually harassed and pick-pocketed of run of the mill household items.
This creates two classes of travelers; the few who follow all these silly regulations to a T, and the rest of us who have figured out how to hide all these items in plain sight and bypass the security mechanisms in place. Putting everything in zip-lock bags, buying small travel-size toothpaste, and ditching lighters is very annoying and cumbersome. But more importantly, failure to do it correctly only results in the loss of a 25-cent lighter, or a $5 tube of toothpaste. This creates a high tolerance for mistakes. It actually makes economic, and common, sense to practice until you can beat all the security mechanisms, so that when you get off the plane your bag still contains your lighter, your toothpaste and your pocket knife.
If you would like to see this in action, your best bet is an airport that still has a smoking lounge behind the security checkpoints. Plant yourself in this lounge, and wait for someone to light up. You'll be surprised to see that 99% of the smokers managed to get their lighters though security.
Ready to try your hand? Go out and get several small pen knifes that cost between $5 to $10, then spend 10 minutes thinking about how an X-Ray machine works, and what its potential limitations might be. Now place the lighters in your bags, and see how many make it though. (random legal disclaimer cause the world is litigious, "I don't encourage or condone this type of activity.")
The real point behind all of this is, if the average air traveler can figure out a plethora of ways to avoid detection at airport security, don't you think the real bad guys, who have money and time at their disposal, can "at will" avoid detection? With that said, what's the point of the TSA ?
If you agree with me I urge you to write your airline of choice, not the TSA or a government official, and simply say the following:
A few people to petition:
United:
pam.coslet@united.com.
glenn.tilton@united.com
graham.atkinson@united.com
Continental Airlines:
custo@coair.com
Delta:
daiquiri.gleaves@delta.com
Southwest:
Kelly.Mumford@southwest.com
Other airlines
http://70.87.68.194/~airline/showthread.php?p=487
If you find other email address for people please post them as comments. The best way to find valid email addresses for real people is to search google and MSN for "customer relations manager" Then search the results. Most of the time you will find at the very least the name of the person who holds that title. Then send out a test email to "firstname.lastname@fooairline.com", "firstinitial.lastname@fooairline.com", etc etc until you get one that doesn't bounce.
"Get rid of your lighter, put your toothpaste in a zip-lock bag and make sure that your pill bottles contain only the number of pills you need for your trip."
This creates two classes of travelers; the few who follow all these silly regulations to a T, and the rest of us who have figured out how to hide all these items in plain sight and bypass the security mechanisms in place. Putting everything in zip-lock bags, buying small travel-size toothpaste, and ditching lighters is very annoying and cumbersome. But more importantly, failure to do it correctly only results in the loss of a 25-cent lighter, or a $5 tube of toothpaste. This creates a high tolerance for mistakes. It actually makes economic, and common, sense to practice until you can beat all the security mechanisms, so that when you get off the plane your bag still contains your lighter, your toothpaste and your pocket knife.
If you would like to see this in action, your best bet is an airport that still has a smoking lounge behind the security checkpoints. Plant yourself in this lounge, and wait for someone to light up. You'll be surprised to see that 99% of the smokers managed to get their lighters though security.
Ready to try your hand? Go out and get several small pen knifes that cost between $5 to $10, then spend 10 minutes thinking about how an X-Ray machine works, and what its potential limitations might be. Now place the lighters in your bags, and see how many make it though. (random legal disclaimer cause the world is litigious, "I don't encourage or condone this type of activity.")
The real point behind all of this is, if the average air traveler can figure out a plethora of ways to avoid detection at airport security, don't you think the real bad guys, who have money and time at their disposal, can "at will" avoid detection? With that said, what's the point of the TSA ?
If you agree with me I urge you to write your airline of choice, not the TSA or a government official, and simply say the following:
"I want air travel to be fun and hassle-free like it used to be. Please lobby the government for less security, and less regulations from the TSA. If you do this for me, I'll fly your airline more often and to more destinations. I am the majority, I am the average "Joe", this is a democracy, you are a business, and I understand that you think you have to look strong on security. However, your customers are smart enough to understand that all this tough talk about security is nothing more than a facade. Please make my travel experience better by eliminating, or severely restricting, the authority of the TSA. In return, I will give you more of my money."
A few people to petition:
United:
pam.coslet@united.com.
glenn.tilton@united.com
graham.atkinson@united.com
Continental Airlines:
custo@coair.com
Delta:
daiquiri.gleaves@delta.com
Southwest:
Kelly.Mumford@southwest.com
Other airlines
http://70.87.68.194/~airline/showthread.php?p=487
If you find other email address for people please post them as comments. The best way to find valid email addresses for real people is to search google and MSN for "customer relations manager
Friday, January 18, 2008
The Center Strikes Back
I loved Cranky's last post so much I had to share this link - Huckabee's Proposed Constitutional Amendments
This about sums up my opinion on the 2008 campaign. I am so tired of the polarized rhetoric in politics today. The only take-away is that, no matter which candidate I chose, I am guaranteed to lose some, or most, of my freedoms!
This about sums up my opinion on the 2008 campaign. I am so tired of the polarized rhetoric in politics today. The only take-away is that, no matter which candidate I chose, I am guaranteed to lose some, or most, of my freedoms!
Monday, January 7, 2008
No one for me in 2008
The only thing on the news as of late is the 2008 Presidential race and the round-the-clock coverage of the Primaries and Caucuses. Since I'm a good little American, and I do exactly what the TV tells me to do, I started thinking about who I am going to vote for in the next election. This irresistible urge to comply with the TV forced me to do millions of Google searches, read all the candidate's websites, troll the forums on major media outlets, and write lots of emails to each candidate on the issues at hand. Unfortunately, after tallying all my results, I've come to the conclusion that I'm pretty much FUBAR when it comes to picking a candidate with views and politics that agree with mine.
The reasons for this are pretty clear, I'm too simple. Now this statement might not make sense to many of you, so I'll lay it out for you without any ambiguity.
My politics are the following.
1. I get to keep my guns, and you don't get to mess with them.
2. I get to keep my money. I made it, it's mine.
3. I don't care about universal health care. 50% of doctors still graduated in the bottom half of their class; it doesn't matter who pays an idiot, the government or me, he's still an idiot.
4. I don't have any faith. There is no God, deal with it, you just die. I don't want the church in my government, and I don't want anything to be decided on faith.
5. Women get to choose. If men got pregnant this wouldn't be an issue, it would be part of the Bill of Rights.
6. Stem cells should be played with as much as possible. Since I got no afterlife coming, I would rather just live forever.
7. Don't spy on me, leave me alone, and I'm not a terrorist. TSA stands for "McDonalds wouldn't hire me/Terrorists Sneak Around". Give me back my lighter, don't take my laptop battery, and zip lock bags don't stop explosions. Please let me get back to enjoying air travel.
8. The government needs to be smaller. Keep the government poor, and remain free.
9. I don't care about Social Security. I'm never gonna see a dime anyways. Figure out how to phase it out.
10. If I have to pay taxes only people who pay taxes get to have my taxes. This is a nice way of saying if you aren't a citizen you don't get to enjoy the benefits of my tax dollars.
Now, given the above I normally favor the Republican party, as it is supposed to stand for "I get to keep my money, my guns, and the government stays small". However as of late the Republican party seems to be waffling on all 3 of these issues, so in all fairness, to find the candidate for me I investigated all the people I could find.
This resulted in the following tally. (shorted to 2 for each side)
Dems:
Hillary Clinton
Pros:
a. Pro-choice
b. Down with stem cells.
c. Godless
Cons:
a. Thinks the 1st and 2nd Amendments aren't part of the Constitution.
b. Champion of universal health care.
c. Wants all my money
Barack Obama:
Pros:
a. Pro-choice
b. Seems to have no real plan for social security. I'll give you a pro on failure to give a crap.
Cons:
a. Plans to use my money to pay for health care, by eliminating tax cuts on the middle class and upper middle class, and then somehow doing some magic of what he calls middle class tax fairness.
b. Really dislikes guns, the NRA rates this guy as Satan.
c. Into the Bible. Defended that he was a Christian, and a true one at that.
Repubs:
Mitt Romney
Pros:
1. Guns are ok, they aren't great, but they are ok.
2. Free market health care. This gets a pro, cause he's in my boat. Doctors can be dumb, no matter who pays them.
Cons:
1. Anti-choice
2. No stem cells, and every time I masturbate I'm killing kids.
3. Loves the God.
Ron Paul
Pros:
1. Small Government
2. Everyone gets a gun.
3. I get to keep all my money.
Cons:
1. Anti Choice - hides behind states rights blah blah blah. Overturn Roe v Wade and all legislation around abortions, because it's not the Fed's problem.
2. No stem cells, the federal government shouldn't fund research around things that are potentially "moral" issues.
3. Thinks teaching Creationism is somehow useful in our schools. Believes Creationism has scientific facts backing it.
After this fun tally I went back and reviewed a number of other presidential hopefuls including McCain, Huckabee, Edwards, Guiliani, Hunter, Thompson, Gravel, Kucinich and came to the following simple conclusion.
The Republican candidates are running the agenda that God is on their side, and because of this abortion is evil; but you get to keep your guns, because we are pretty sure we are evil and you might have to use them to get rid of us. Additionally, the Republicans are running on the platform of smaller government because they believe Congress and the Senate are incompetent, so we should leave things to the states. While on the other hand they want to increase funding to our security agencies, and make it easier to spy on us under the illusion that it keeps America strong. They also want to make DHS bigger, because somehow that agency of the government isn't incompetent.
The Democrats are running on the agenda that you, America, are idiots and they are a super-race of social problem-solvers. They plan to fund stem cell research, so the rich can live forever, while getting taxed to death to pay for a broken social security program. Additionally, they want to tax the almost rich, so they never become rich, to pay for social welfare and universal heath care. All the while taking my guns, and making the government the largest employer in America.
Given the above I've decided that I cannot support any of the current presidential candidates. This is why I'm announcing my bid for president, the cornerstone of my campaign agenda will be the following:
1. Everyone woman gets the right to choose whether or not she will carry a child.
2. I get to have all the guns and ammo I want.
3. I will never trade freedom for security.
4. I will close down the DEA and all the money used on the War on Drugs will be funneled into Social Security. I will then pay out all outstanding balances in the Social Security system and disband the program.
5. I will remove Creationism and Intelligent Design from all Federally-funded educational institutions.
6. I will disband the TSA and "ebay" everything they have confiscated over the years. This should generate billions of dollars. I will take this money to improve our education system.
7. I will severely limit the welfare system, and make it harder to get into it and faster to get out of it. I will encourage people with compassion to start non-profit organizations to help people, if that is what they like to do.
8. On immigration I will open our boarders, as immigration is what made this country. There is no such thing as an American. We all immigrated from somewhere. However if you don't pay taxes, you don't get to use public services; and if you want to be an American citizen you must speak and read English. I will pass legislation to make English the official language of the land.
9. I will overturn the Digital Millennium Copyrights Act (DMCA). American companies should innovate, not litigate, to stay competitive in a global market.
10. I will support a free and open Internet. Network providers will not be allowed to filter content, restrict content, or impose regulations of supported vs not supported protocols or services. I pay for bandwidth. If that is what you sell, then that is what I'm buying.
11. I will overhaul the FDA, so drugs can reach sick people quicker. This will come at the price of safety, in some situations. The American people will be informed of this, and can make their own decisions as to whether or not to take a drug or undergo a procedure that has inherent risk.
12. I will stay in Iraq. Just because the previous administration made a terrible mistake, doesn't mean I'm not obligated to clean up the mess.
13. I will remove the federal regulations that mandate states institute 21 as the legal drinking age, .08 as the legal blood alcohol level, and 55 mph as the maximum speed limit in order to receive federal road money.
14. I will do a bong hit in the oval office, and I will inhale.
15. I will encourage states to hold open votes on the issues of gay marriage. If your state wants this, they can pass their own laws based on the majority of the voting population.
Vote CrankyinColumbia in 08
The reasons for this are pretty clear, I'm too simple. Now this statement might not make sense to many of you, so I'll lay it out for you without any ambiguity.
My politics are the following.
1. I get to keep my guns, and you don't get to mess with them.
2. I get to keep my money. I made it, it's mine.
3. I don't care about universal health care. 50% of doctors still graduated in the bottom half of their class; it doesn't matter who pays an idiot, the government or me, he's still an idiot.
4. I don't have any faith. There is no God, deal with it, you just die. I don't want the church in my government, and I don't want anything to be decided on faith.
5. Women get to choose. If men got pregnant this wouldn't be an issue, it would be part of the Bill of Rights.
6. Stem cells should be played with as much as possible. Since I got no afterlife coming, I would rather just live forever.
7. Don't spy on me, leave me alone, and I'm not a terrorist. TSA stands for "McDonalds wouldn't hire me/Terrorists Sneak Around". Give me back my lighter, don't take my laptop battery, and zip lock bags don't stop explosions. Please let me get back to enjoying air travel.
8. The government needs to be smaller. Keep the government poor, and remain free.
9. I don't care about Social Security. I'm never gonna see a dime anyways. Figure out how to phase it out.
10. If I have to pay taxes only people who pay taxes get to have my taxes. This is a nice way of saying if you aren't a citizen you don't get to enjoy the benefits of my tax dollars.
Now, given the above I normally favor the Republican party, as it is supposed to stand for "I get to keep my money, my guns, and the government stays small". However as of late the Republican party seems to be waffling on all 3 of these issues, so in all fairness, to find the candidate for me I investigated all the people I could find.
This resulted in the following tally. (shorted to 2 for each side)
Dems:
Hillary Clinton
Pros:
a. Pro-choice
b. Down with stem cells.
c. Godless
Cons:
a. Thinks the 1st and 2nd Amendments aren't part of the Constitution.
b. Champion of universal health care.
c. Wants all my money
Barack Obama:
Pros:
a. Pro-choice
b. Seems to have no real plan for social security. I'll give you a pro on failure to give a crap.
Cons:
a. Plans to use my money to pay for health care, by eliminating tax cuts on the middle class and upper middle class, and then somehow doing some magic of what he calls middle class tax fairness.
b. Really dislikes guns, the NRA rates this guy as Satan.
c. Into the Bible. Defended that he was a Christian, and a true one at that.
Repubs:
Mitt Romney
Pros:
1. Guns are ok, they aren't great, but they are ok.
2. Free market health care. This gets a pro, cause he's in my boat. Doctors can be dumb, no matter who pays them.
Cons:
1. Anti-choice
2. No stem cells, and every time I masturbate I'm killing kids.
3. Loves the God.
Ron Paul
Pros:
1. Small Government
2. Everyone gets a gun.
3. I get to keep all my money.
Cons:
1. Anti Choice - hides behind states rights blah blah blah. Overturn Roe v Wade and all legislation around abortions, because it's not the Fed's problem.
2. No stem cells, the federal government shouldn't fund research around things that are potentially "moral" issues.
3. Thinks teaching Creationism is somehow useful in our schools. Believes Creationism has scientific facts backing it.
After this fun tally I went back and reviewed a number of other presidential hopefuls including McCain, Huckabee, Edwards, Guiliani, Hunter, Thompson, Gravel, Kucinich and came to the following simple conclusion.
The Republican candidates are running the agenda that God is on their side, and because of this abortion is evil; but you get to keep your guns, because we are pretty sure we are evil and you might have to use them to get rid of us. Additionally, the Republicans are running on the platform of smaller government because they believe Congress and the Senate are incompetent, so we should leave things to the states. While on the other hand they want to increase funding to our security agencies, and make it easier to spy on us under the illusion that it keeps America strong. They also want to make DHS bigger, because somehow that agency of the government isn't incompetent.
The Democrats are running on the agenda that you, America, are idiots and they are a super-race of social problem-solvers. They plan to fund stem cell research, so the rich can live forever, while getting taxed to death to pay for a broken social security program. Additionally, they want to tax the almost rich, so they never become rich, to pay for social welfare and universal heath care. All the while taking my guns, and making the government the largest employer in America.
Given the above I've decided that I cannot support any of the current presidential candidates. This is why I'm announcing my bid for president, the cornerstone of my campaign agenda will be the following:
1. Everyone woman gets the right to choose whether or not she will carry a child.
2. I get to have all the guns and ammo I want.
3. I will never trade freedom for security.
4. I will close down the DEA and all the money used on the War on Drugs will be funneled into Social Security. I will then pay out all outstanding balances in the Social Security system and disband the program.
5. I will remove Creationism and Intelligent Design from all Federally-funded educational institutions.
6. I will disband the TSA and "ebay" everything they have confiscated over the years. This should generate billions of dollars. I will take this money to improve our education system.
7. I will severely limit the welfare system, and make it harder to get into it and faster to get out of it. I will encourage people with compassion to start non-profit organizations to help people, if that is what they like to do.
8. On immigration I will open our boarders, as immigration is what made this country. There is no such thing as an American. We all immigrated from somewhere. However if you don't pay taxes, you don't get to use public services; and if you want to be an American citizen you must speak and read English. I will pass legislation to make English the official language of the land.
9. I will overturn the Digital Millennium Copyrights Act (DMCA). American companies should innovate, not litigate, to stay competitive in a global market.
10. I will support a free and open Internet. Network providers will not be allowed to filter content, restrict content, or impose regulations of supported vs not supported protocols or services. I pay for bandwidth. If that is what you sell, then that is what I'm buying.
11. I will overhaul the FDA, so drugs can reach sick people quicker. This will come at the price of safety, in some situations. The American people will be informed of this, and can make their own decisions as to whether or not to take a drug or undergo a procedure that has inherent risk.
12. I will stay in Iraq. Just because the previous administration made a terrible mistake, doesn't mean I'm not obligated to clean up the mess.
13. I will remove the federal regulations that mandate states institute 21 as the legal drinking age, .08 as the legal blood alcohol level, and 55 mph as the maximum speed limit in order to receive federal road money.
14. I will do a bong hit in the oval office, and I will inhale.
15. I will encourage states to hold open votes on the issues of gay marriage. If your state wants this, they can pass their own laws based on the majority of the voting population.
Vote CrankyinColumbia in 08
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Sushi! Sushi! Sushi!
I finally found a good restaurant in Columbia! Sushi King in the Dobbin Center. I was never a fan of Sono - having once spent a night in the bathroom after dining there - so I'd given up on sushi in Columbia. Niko Japanese restaurant in the Normandy Center (route 40 - Ellicott City) is ok, but pales in comparison to my Bethesda favorite, Tako Grill. However Baltimore magazine pointed me to Sushi King (never would've looked for eats next to the MVA Express, but such is the nature of suburbia), and we finally went for dinner.
Loved the food, and the atmosphere, but the service was a bit slackin' and the high proportion of little kids out past their bedtime was somewhat unnerving. One parent was seen bargaining with her tyke in an attempt to convince him that he should "do the right thing" and come out from under the table. I seem to recall spankings being a more effective deterrent to crawling around the floors of public places, but what do I know...?
The real, live plants are a nice touch, though I could've used some scissors to gently prune back the overzealous pothos that was crowding me throughout dinner. I also have never had such a hard time keeping my water glass full in a restaurant. Same for the hot tea; the server didn't ask to fill it up until we were paying the check, despite the fact that I set the glass on the outer edge of the table as a hint (hello? empty! please refill, or remove). Paying the check took longer than getting the food, meanwhile an increasingly angry crowd was building up in the tiny reception area behind me. Guess they were short-staffed?
Since this is a blog centered around narcissistic b!tching and moaning, I figure I can get away with one more gripe (keep in mind this *is* a positive review). When I order the shrimp tempura appetizer I want shrimp tempura...at least four pieces of shrimp tempura. What I got were two shrimp, and a pile of vegetable tempura (there's a reason I did not order the vegetable tempura, and it has everything to do with why I ordered the shrimp tempura). Still, it was tasty, and I suppose there are far worse things in life (bargaining with a toddler comes to mind) than eating some unexpected vegetables.
So if you love sushi, but you hate going to the MVA, you might have missed this one. Do yourself a favor and go there (but try to get seated before 6pm, or it could be a lonnnnnng wait).
Loved the food, and the atmosphere, but the service was a bit slackin' and the high proportion of little kids out past their bedtime was somewhat unnerving. One parent was seen bargaining with her tyke in an attempt to convince him that he should "do the right thing" and come out from under the table. I seem to recall spankings being a more effective deterrent to crawling around the floors of public places, but what do I know...?
The real, live plants are a nice touch, though I could've used some scissors to gently prune back the overzealous pothos that was crowding me throughout dinner. I also have never had such a hard time keeping my water glass full in a restaurant. Same for the hot tea; the server didn't ask to fill it up until we were paying the check, despite the fact that I set the glass on the outer edge of the table as a hint (hello? empty! please refill, or remove). Paying the check took longer than getting the food, meanwhile an increasingly angry crowd was building up in the tiny reception area behind me. Guess they were short-staffed?
Since this is a blog centered around narcissistic b!tching and moaning, I figure I can get away with one more gripe (keep in mind this *is* a positive review). When I order the shrimp tempura appetizer I want shrimp tempura...at least four pieces of shrimp tempura. What I got were two shrimp, and a pile of vegetable tempura (there's a reason I did not order the vegetable tempura, and it has everything to do with why I ordered the shrimp tempura). Still, it was tasty, and I suppose there are far worse things in life (bargaining with a toddler comes to mind) than eating some unexpected vegetables.
So if you love sushi, but you hate going to the MVA, you might have missed this one. Do yourself a favor and go there (but try to get seated before 6pm, or it could be a lonnnnnng wait).
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
They are good .... for now
It's been awhile since my last post, as I've been cranky and busy. This leaves little time for diatribes on what infuriates me in Columbia. Additionally, being busy for me means I don't get to spend much time in Columbia interacting with the things that plague me, and this town. This is both good and bad, on one side I don't have to deal with the silliness of the Kinkos that can't figure out how to make cards, the Zombieness of Creig, or even the extreme lack of decent food and shopping in the area. That would be the good. On the other side it means I don't get to be creative and poke fun at all the things that make me cranky. So, since I have a few minutes this evening, and there are a number of new places to attack, I'm gonna poke fun at Columbia...again.
The new Columbia Gateway Overlook shopping center is definitely the easiest new thing at which to sling mud. This mega shopping center brings all the things that should have been here 10 years ago. It includes such simple things as a Trader Joes, a Costco, a Houlihans, an On the Border, some crappy (possibly French) cafe thing that is out of place, a Lowes (maybe now HomeDepot will stop sucking), something called 5 Below (seems like the dollar store + 4), and a right wingding Christian book store (also out of place). The funniest thing about it is I can't believe it took so long for these retailers to realize that there is no competition in Columbia.
Here are some simple examples of no competition in Columbia
Mexican food: Don Pablos, the most awful Mexican food possible. Taco bell and this place go round for round on who can give you the most gas. (Mar y Tiera in King's Contrivance was good for about three weeks, before even these hard-working restaurateurs realized where they were and stopped trying.)
American Food: TGI Fridays, and some assorted other low-brow eateries. The last time some thing came out that kitchen sizzling, Nixon was president.
Home Improvement: HomeDepot (HomeDespot), if you find an employee at this location that has actually built something, explain to them that Lowes is now open and they should be with their own kind.
Electronics and other such stuff: Best Buy and CompUseless, where the F*ck is my Fry's or Circuit City.
Groceries: Safeway and Giant, they are in every village center and they all blow. I challenge you to find 2% low-fat organic yogurt at these stores.
Hopefully, now that Trader Joes, On the Border, Houlihans, Costco, and Lowes are on the scene things will begin to suck less. Additionally, I hope someone who owns a Fry's, Circuit City, Rio Grande, Ruth Chris, Whole Foods, Wild Oats, or just about anything that doesn't suck reads my blog. If you do please come to Columbia, we have people and money, and no good stuff, I swear.
But I digress, the real point of this entry was to discuss the fact that "On the Border", "Houlihans", and Trader Joes are now open. For the next two or three weeks all these stores will be in top form. The reason for this, is that the best of the best waitresses, chefs, and bag boys/girls from all the other locations are on site training the real staff. So quickly, while it's good, get the waitress from Arkansas ( not kidding ) at On the Border to make your guacamole in front of you, before the guy from Kinkos who can't work the copier tries to do it.
Hopefully I'm wrong about this possibility of a bleak future. Hopefully, this is the turning over of a new leaf in Columbia. But I won't be holding my breath.
Before I close out this entry tonight, I want to state one more thing. For all those old timers in Columbia that are Cranky about Columbia OverLook and like to call it Box Store Hill and complain about how it looks, and about big stores killing local merchants, I have one thing to say: "Go die in a fire". The local merchants left years ago, there is no good food, and if it wasn't for the Internet I wouldn't have had anywhere to spend my money for the past 3 years. Oh that reminds me, Comcast eat a bag, I've got FIOS now.
The new Columbia Gateway Overlook shopping center is definitely the easiest new thing at which to sling mud. This mega shopping center brings all the things that should have been here 10 years ago. It includes such simple things as a Trader Joes, a Costco, a Houlihans, an On the Border, some crappy (possibly French) cafe thing that is out of place, a Lowes (maybe now HomeDepot will stop sucking), something called 5 Below (seems like the dollar store + 4), and a right wingding Christian book store (also out of place). The funniest thing about it is I can't believe it took so long for these retailers to realize that there is no competition in Columbia.
Here are some simple examples of no competition in Columbia
Mexican food: Don Pablos, the most awful Mexican food possible. Taco bell and this place go round for round on who can give you the most gas. (Mar y Tiera in King's Contrivance was good for about three weeks, before even these hard-working restaurateurs realized where they were and stopped trying.)
American Food: TGI Fridays, and some assorted other low-brow eateries. The last time some thing came out that kitchen sizzling, Nixon was president.
Home Improvement: HomeDepot (HomeDespot), if you find an employee at this location that has actually built something, explain to them that Lowes is now open and they should be with their own kind.
Electronics and other such stuff: Best Buy and CompUseless, where the F*ck is my Fry's or Circuit City.
Groceries: Safeway and Giant, they are in every village center and they all blow. I challenge you to find 2% low-fat organic yogurt at these stores.
Hopefully, now that Trader Joes, On the Border, Houlihans, Costco, and Lowes are on the scene things will begin to suck less. Additionally, I hope someone who owns a Fry's, Circuit City, Rio Grande, Ruth Chris, Whole Foods, Wild Oats, or just about anything that doesn't suck reads my blog. If you do please come to Columbia, we have people and money, and no good stuff, I swear.
But I digress, the real point of this entry was to discuss the fact that "On the Border", "Houlihans", and Trader Joes are now open. For the next two or three weeks all these stores will be in top form. The reason for this, is that the best of the best waitresses, chefs, and bag boys/girls from all the other locations are on site training the real staff. So quickly, while it's good, get the waitress from Arkansas ( not kidding ) at On the Border to make your guacamole in front of you, before the guy from Kinkos who can't work the copier tries to do it.
Hopefully I'm wrong about this possibility of a bleak future. Hopefully, this is the turning over of a new leaf in Columbia. But I won't be holding my breath.
Before I close out this entry tonight, I want to state one more thing. For all those old timers in Columbia that are Cranky about Columbia OverLook and like to call it Box Store Hill and complain about how it looks, and about big stores killing local merchants, I have one thing to say: "Go die in a fire". The local merchants left years ago, there is no good food, and if it wasn't for the Internet I wouldn't have had anywhere to spend my money for the past 3 years. Oh that reminds me, Comcast eat a bag, I've got FIOS now.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Creig Northrop is a Zombie
If you watch TV, drive, or even walk in Columbia you know who Creig Northrop is. Additionally you know all about the Northrop Team and wonders of his Real Estate Empire. Unfortunately this guy is scary looking, and his mug is on every one of the Long and Foster "For Sale" signs. This guy is so scary that the runner up in Columbia is a guy named Pat Hiban, who isn't scary looking but his name is only a few characters short of Hymen. High School must of been a bitch for that guy. But I digress, every time I see a picture of good ole Creig (why can't you spell is the easy way), I think of an old movie. That old movie is Night of the Living Dead, cause this guy looks like a zombie.
Just in case you don't know Creig, here is a picture:
and here is a picture of a Zombie
I believe the proof is obvious.
Just in case you don't know Creig, here is a picture:
and here is a picture of a Zombie
I believe the proof is obvious.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Baltimore-area Vendors That Rock
Cranky and I frequently use this blog to rant about the lost art of customer service. We've bemoaned the incompetence of Kinkos, the laziness of contractors and the dearth of fine dining in suburbia. Finally, we have something good to report!
If you read the Kinkos fiasco you know that we were in the throes of planning a wedding. This is a daunting task, because no matter how much time, money and emotional fortitude you throw at the "Wedding-Industrial Complex" the "machine" will find a way to demand more...More...MORE!
Eventually you realize that you are powerless. You gave up any semblance of control the day you signed your first wedding-related contract. You no longer have the option of refusing to pay for stuff you never knew you wanted, or needed. You no longer have control over when or why you use annual leave; it's now commandeered for countless vendor appointments, often with last-minute re-scheduling, at times that are invariably only convenient for the vendor. Worst of all, family and friends suddenly decide that it's open season on the engaged couple; launching a volley of suggestions, excuses and complaints, as though the event in question were really about them, and not the couple getting married.
We had some interesting problems with our wedding. More vexing than any of the suggestions, and/or complaints we received from loved ones were the things we did not receive from our vendors. These things came mostly in the form of services paid for, but not rendered. For example, we did not receive a refund on our $3000 deposit, paid to one now-defunct charter company by the name of Clipper City Tall Ship, LLC. I also did not receive a call from Columbia Bridal & Tuxedo to cancel my dress fitting; instead they let me find out the hard way that my dress was not ready on the day that I was scheduled to come in for a fitting (there goes another half day of annual leave...).
To say I was an unwilling participant in planning my own wedding is an understatement. Cranky often had to console me as I shook my fists at the sky and declared that I hated "The Wedding." However, in retrospect, I must say that the actual affair turned out beautifully. Everything was special and lovely and magical and...dare I say, perfect.
This was all thanks to a couple of fantastic companies that actually did their jobs. Finding them wasn't easy, it literally happened by accident.
The sheer effort of finding a place to have a wedding in the Baltimore-Washington area took a lot out of Mr. and Mrs. Cranky. The thought of plunking down major coin for a four-hour extravaganza just didn't sit right with us. Yet the traditionalist lurking within crumbled when both sets of parents (who wisely chose to elope) said "Oh, a wedding will be so much fun!" I had one requirement: waterfront. So we started looking for a suitable waterfront venue that didn't require a Hollywood pocketbook, but wouldn't result in Styrofoam containers and paper napkins. This was far more challenging than I ever imagined.
What I should have done is gone straight down to the Inner Harbor and asked for Laura Givens at the USS Constellation museum (www.constellation.org). Laid-back, friendly and competent, Laura made us feel at ease about moving our event from the ill-fated Clipper City to the much classier Constellation. She also has a good relationship with Charles Levine Catering, whom we had already retained through Clipper City.
Charles is an event-planning genius with culinary skills to match. He took care of the flowers, the staffing, the bar, the cake, the tables and chairs, the linens, the music and the food. He read my mind on all of those things without me having to do the work of figuring out how I really wanted the wedding to look, taste and sound.
His crab cakes were all backfin, with just enough filler to hold them together. The wedding cake was the closest approximation to a Snickers bar I could imagine possible. Then there was Joel Holmes, a Peabody Conservatory-trained jazz musician with an entourage of talent that includes his violinist wife and a congo player to make Tito Puente proud. Nothing beats dancing to the rhythms of Latin jazz under the stars and the rigging of an authentic tall ship!
If you read the Kinkos fiasco you know that we were in the throes of planning a wedding. This is a daunting task, because no matter how much time, money and emotional fortitude you throw at the "Wedding-Industrial Complex" the "machine" will find a way to demand more...More...MORE!
Eventually you realize that you are powerless. You gave up any semblance of control the day you signed your first wedding-related contract. You no longer have the option of refusing to pay for stuff you never knew you wanted, or needed. You no longer have control over when or why you use annual leave; it's now commandeered for countless vendor appointments, often with last-minute re-scheduling, at times that are invariably only convenient for the vendor. Worst of all, family and friends suddenly decide that it's open season on the engaged couple; launching a volley of suggestions, excuses and complaints, as though the event in question were really about them, and not the couple getting married.
We had some interesting problems with our wedding. More vexing than any of the suggestions, and/or complaints we received from loved ones were the things we did not receive from our vendors. These things came mostly in the form of services paid for, but not rendered. For example, we did not receive a refund on our $3000 deposit, paid to one now-defunct charter company by the name of Clipper City Tall Ship, LLC. I also did not receive a call from Columbia Bridal & Tuxedo to cancel my dress fitting; instead they let me find out the hard way that my dress was not ready on the day that I was scheduled to come in for a fitting (there goes another half day of annual leave...).
To say I was an unwilling participant in planning my own wedding is an understatement. Cranky often had to console me as I shook my fists at the sky and declared that I hated "The Wedding." However, in retrospect, I must say that the actual affair turned out beautifully. Everything was special and lovely and magical and...dare I say, perfect.
This was all thanks to a couple of fantastic companies that actually did their jobs. Finding them wasn't easy, it literally happened by accident.
The sheer effort of finding a place to have a wedding in the Baltimore-Washington area took a lot out of Mr. and Mrs. Cranky. The thought of plunking down major coin for a four-hour extravaganza just didn't sit right with us. Yet the traditionalist lurking within crumbled when both sets of parents (who wisely chose to elope) said "Oh, a wedding will be so much fun!" I had one requirement: waterfront. So we started looking for a suitable waterfront venue that didn't require a Hollywood pocketbook, but wouldn't result in Styrofoam containers and paper napkins. This was far more challenging than I ever imagined.
What I should have done is gone straight down to the Inner Harbor and asked for Laura Givens at the USS Constellation museum (www.constellation.org). Laid-back, friendly and competent, Laura made us feel at ease about moving our event from the ill-fated Clipper City to the much classier Constellation. She also has a good relationship with Charles Levine Catering, whom we had already retained through Clipper City.Charles is an event-planning genius with culinary skills to match. He took care of the flowers, the staffing, the bar, the cake, the tables and chairs, the linens, the music and the food. He read my mind on all of those things without me having to do the work of figuring out how I really wanted the wedding to look, taste and sound.
His crab cakes were all backfin, with just enough filler to hold them together. The wedding cake was the closest approximation to a Snickers bar I could imagine possible. Then there was Joel Holmes, a Peabody Conservatory-trained jazz musician with an entourage of talent that includes his violinist wife and a congo player to make Tito Puente proud. Nothing beats dancing to the rhythms of Latin jazz under the stars and the rigging of an authentic tall ship!
Sunday, August 19, 2007
WiFi Fun
Cranky really enjoys being able to blog, work, surf the net, and goof off anywhere in the house. So when my D-Link Wireless AP's finally died I was very depressed and knew that I finally needed to upgrade the WiFi network. Since I'm a technical guy I did my homework and layed out several requirements for what I needed.
Requirements.
1. There is no hardwired internet upstairs so i needed something with an Ethernet jack that I could plug into my switches so the upstairs desktop computers still worked.
2. The hardwired ethernet in the house is downstairs and is all Gig-E so the BaseStation needed to be gig-e.
3. I really needed WDS so all the AP's and Base Stations could act as one big network.
4. I needed something that would work with my legacy 802.11b/g wireless cards in some of the laptops.
5. I wanted something that also supported 802.11n and MIMO.
6. It needed to be easy to work with and deploy
Based on those requirements I came to two conclusions. Either Apple Airports or linksys WRT300N's. Both seemed reasonable choices, and the Linksys boxes are even hackable which adds all kinds of other neat features.
In the end I went with the Apple setup, the main reason was each Airport Express had and extra feature that the linksys AP's don't have. They have an audio jack that allows you to stream music to them. This sold me, as I have several stereo systems in the house that I could finally stream all my mp3's too.
Nows the part where I bitch about Columbia. I went to go purchase my Airports, since CompuUseless was the closed store, I headed there. What I found was no Airports or Extremes, or even the Linksys devices I scoped out. I also found no staff. This store should be closed down, it never has anything I need. Radio Shack carries more stuff in it's store in the Mall. I want a Fry's, Fry's is way better than CompUseless and Best Buy.
Once I realized that CompUseless was useless I headed to the Apple Store at the mall. Thankfully Columbia just got one of these, it's been open for about 5 months. I really didn't want to drive down to Tysons to the real Apple store that's been there forever..... The Columbia Mall Apple store actually impressed me, it had lots of inventory and also had everything I needed. I also found out that sales associates are called Mac Geniuses, so I tested them with the following question.
Do the Apple Extreme support MIMO and WDS, also since it support 802.11g will performance degrade in mixed 802.11b/g/n environments?
This was met with very blank stares, I realized Geniuses meant sales associate. I returned the nice person to their proper customer greeting location and pointed them to someone with an easier question.
At least they had all my gear. So for the details on cost and setup, read on.
Cost:
1. Apple Base Station Extreme - ~180.00 US
2. 2 x Apple Express - ~100.00 US ( 200 total )
Total cost roughly $380.00
I also had another Express that I received as a gift from work. So all in all 3 apple expresses and one apple extreme.
The checkout lady thought I must be wiring a warehouse, with all this glories WiFi power.
Setup:
1. Install the CD that comes with the Extreme First. It contains a utility called Airport Utility, this is the only CD you actually need to install. Don't use the utilities from the Express CD's.
2. Plugin the Extreme and fire up the Airport Utility
3. You'll see the picture of the hardware on the scree, Click on Manual Setup.
4. Under "Wireless" tab set Wireless mode to "Participate in WDS network". This is the most important step.
5. Configure all the other tabs to your liking / network. Make sure the Extreme has a unique name for your network also write down it's Airport ID number.
6. Open all the Express boxes and write down their airport ids
7. On the WDS tab on the Extreme set mode to "Base Station" a little box will show up for all the Client IDS. Add all the Aiport Ids for the Expresses to this box.
8. Save everything and wait for it to reboot.
Setup for the Expresses
1. Plugin in one express at a time for this.
2. The express will show up in the Airport Utility also. Click on Manual Setup.
3. Under Wireless set Wireless mode to "participate in wds network"
4. Go to WDS tab, set it to "remote base", then type in the Airport ID for the extreme in the box.
5. Set the name for the network to something other than what the extreme is. Save and reboot it.
6. Connect to the Expresses network name with your wifi. Browse Internet, if everything is working it's talking to the basestation and the basestation is forwarding it to the internet.
7. Return to Airport Utility and bring the Express back up. Change the network name to the same name as the Extreme. Save reboot.
8. Rinse repeat for the other Expresses.
Once everything is up, i suggest turning on WPA security. The reason for this is that with 3 expresses and 1 base station you are now a wireless hot spot for your entire neighborhood. People two block away will get signal on your gear.
Requirements.
1. There is no hardwired internet upstairs so i needed something with an Ethernet jack that I could plug into my switches so the upstairs desktop computers still worked.
2. The hardwired ethernet in the house is downstairs and is all Gig-E so the BaseStation needed to be gig-e.
3. I really needed WDS so all the AP's and Base Stations could act as one big network.
4. I needed something that would work with my legacy 802.11b/g wireless cards in some of the laptops.
5. I wanted something that also supported 802.11n and MIMO.
6. It needed to be easy to work with and deploy
Based on those requirements I came to two conclusions. Either Apple Airports or linksys WRT300N's. Both seemed reasonable choices, and the Linksys boxes are even hackable which adds all kinds of other neat features.
In the end I went with the Apple setup, the main reason was each Airport Express had and extra feature that the linksys AP's don't have. They have an audio jack that allows you to stream music to them. This sold me, as I have several stereo systems in the house that I could finally stream all my mp3's too.
Nows the part where I bitch about Columbia. I went to go purchase my Airports, since CompuUseless was the closed store, I headed there. What I found was no Airports or Extremes, or even the Linksys devices I scoped out. I also found no staff. This store should be closed down, it never has anything I need. Radio Shack carries more stuff in it's store in the Mall. I want a Fry's, Fry's is way better than CompUseless and Best Buy.
Once I realized that CompUseless was useless I headed to the Apple Store at the mall. Thankfully Columbia just got one of these, it's been open for about 5 months. I really didn't want to drive down to Tysons to the real Apple store that's been there forever..... The Columbia Mall Apple store actually impressed me, it had lots of inventory and also had everything I needed. I also found out that sales associates are called Mac Geniuses, so I tested them with the following question.
Do the Apple Extreme support MIMO and WDS, also since it support 802.11g will performance degrade in mixed 802.11b/g/n environments?
This was met with very blank stares, I realized Geniuses meant sales associate. I returned the nice person to their proper customer greeting location and pointed them to someone with an easier question.
At least they had all my gear. So for the details on cost and setup, read on.
Cost:
1. Apple Base Station Extreme - ~180.00 US
2. 2 x Apple Express - ~100.00 US ( 200 total )
Total cost roughly $380.00
I also had another Express that I received as a gift from work. So all in all 3 apple expresses and one apple extreme.
The checkout lady thought I must be wiring a warehouse, with all this glories WiFi power.
Setup:
1. Install the CD that comes with the Extreme First. It contains a utility called Airport Utility, this is the only CD you actually need to install. Don't use the utilities from the Express CD's.
2. Plugin the Extreme and fire up the Airport Utility
3. You'll see the picture of the hardware on the scree, Click on Manual Setup.
4. Under "Wireless" tab set Wireless mode to "Participate in WDS network". This is the most important step.
5. Configure all the other tabs to your liking / network. Make sure the Extreme has a unique name for your network also write down it's Airport ID number.
6. Open all the Express boxes and write down their airport ids
7. On the WDS tab on the Extreme set mode to "Base Station" a little box will show up for all the Client IDS. Add all the Aiport Ids for the Expresses to this box.
8. Save everything and wait for it to reboot.
Setup for the Expresses
1. Plugin in one express at a time for this.
2. The express will show up in the Airport Utility also. Click on Manual Setup.
3. Under Wireless set Wireless mode to "participate in wds network"
4. Go to WDS tab, set it to "remote base", then type in the Airport ID for the extreme in the box.
5. Set the name for the network to something other than what the extreme is. Save and reboot it.
6. Connect to the Expresses network name with your wifi. Browse Internet, if everything is working it's talking to the basestation and the basestation is forwarding it to the internet.
7. Return to Airport Utility and bring the Express back up. Change the network name to the same name as the Extreme. Save reboot.
8. Rinse repeat for the other Expresses.
Once everything is up, i suggest turning on WPA security. The reason for this is that with 3 expresses and 1 base station you are now a wireless hot spot for your entire neighborhood. People two block away will get signal on your gear.
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